My current thoughts

May 8th 2020, Friday, Belgrade

Today has been about reconnecting, socially and emotionally. Socially with people around me, my friends and close ones. Emotionally with myself, I discover more things about myself everyday which is very productive.

Stoicism and Taoism, the two new philosophies I like to think explain my current life situation very well. While not fully satisfied with the version of myself I currently am, to be aware of such a fact alone is a victory. I’m not wasting my time away, while crying over not being satisfied with myself. I know what I’m doing, I do it because I want to, I do it because I like do it. Not smoking my worries away, because I have no worries. Not being mad at friends for stupid acts, because I’m not worried about other peoples mindset. I only care about the response I give to the situation I’m currently facing.

Now while looking back at this article, there’s a lot of “I”s in it. I = ego. Trying to get away from the ego is always hard. Accepting the ego is part of letting go. The ultimate goal is to have no wants, to have no ego, to have no desires, that will truly be happiness.

Is it happiness I’m searching for? Not necessarily. Striving for something is always good, nonetheless, Taoism teaches that the act of striving for something, striving for change, will ultimately cause you to go off the natural way of life and give in to man-made things. Men put a label on everything, there’s categories for everything you can think of. Living in today’s world and knowing all this puts everything into perspective. All that we know, all that we are is man-made, until you start realizing that it’s not. It’s way more. So much more. Life can be beautiful and free, life can be an amazing adventure.

This isn’t my usual article on medium, just something I wrote down months ago, and I’m just now seeing it again. It’s nice reading things like this from the past, shows me some real growth.